another conversation with si kecik.....

irfan with dede
inside achiks room

IRFAN: tokling x blk eh?
DEDE: tak... kenape? irfan nak jumpe tokling?
IRFAN: nak....
DEDE: klu irfan jumpe tokling irfan nak buat aper?
IRFAN: cium.....

irfan with ummi(my mum)
in the kitchen

IRFAN: Ummi... Irfan nak cium tokling...
UMMI: Tokling xde.. Irfan sayang tokling?
IRFAN: sayang...
UMMI: banyak ke cket?
IRFAN: banyak.....

irfan with daddy(my bro)
in my mums car

IRFAN: tokling mane?
DADDY: tokling kat syurga
IRFAN: tokling dah baik?
DADDY: dah.... ifan, kite da x ble jumpe tokling lg...
{silent}
IRFAN: tokling selalu bwk irfan pegi tgk crane, bajak, fireman....

conversation with si kecik..

IRFAN : dede kita nak gi mane? kite nak pegi tgk tokling eh?
ME : tak... irfan nak gi mane?
IRFAN: ifan nak gi hospital... tgk tok ling...
ME: ifan rindu tokling?
IRFAN: rindu.....
ME: banyak ke sikit?
IRFAN: banyak....
ME: ifan... tokling dah xde... kite dah x dpt jumpe tokling lg... mcm mane doa utk tokling?
IRFAN: Ya Allah sembuhkan Tokling...
ME: Tokling dah sembuh tp Allah sayang tokling...Dia jage tokling... Mummy kan da ajar ifan doa lain... mcm mane? cube bace... dede nak dgr....
IRFAN: Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku... Masukkan tokling ke dalam syurga.... tokling dah xde.... Allah jage tokling....

"Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku, berikan ku kekuatan dan semangat untuk menjage insan kecil kesayangan bapaku ini..."

he was a handsome man......

lagu sedey... terkenangkan abah....

di pondok kecil...

dipondok kecil di pantai ombak

berbuih putih beralun-alun

disuatu hari ayah berkata

jaga adik mu ayahkan pergi jauh

ku pandang wajah ayah dahinya ku cium

air mata mengalir hatiku pilu

diam-diamlah sayang jangan menangis

doakan ayah semoga diterima

diam adik ku sayang jangan menangis

andai ayah gugur doakan dia syahid

selamat berjuangan ayah tercinta

kau pergi dulu ayah ke medan juang

ku iringi doa moga berjaya

beroleh kemenangan demi agama Islam

wahai abang ku kemana

ayah ku sayang ayah ku cinta ayah 2x

duhai adik ku sayang jangan bersedih

ayah mu pergi menyambut seruan Ilahi

tapi ingatlah adik ku pesanan ayah

berjuangan dan berkorban walau dimana jua

pada Mu Tuhan aku bermohon

dosa ayah ku minta diampunkan

berilah rahmat bantulah dia

untuk menegakkan agama Islam

sempurna

diz song shows how close we are....
Abah... i'll be missing u forever...

Kau begitu sempurna
Dimataku kau begitu indah
Kau membuat diriku
Akan selalu memujamu

Disetiap langkahku
Kukan selalu memikirkan dirimu
Tak bisa kubayangkan
Hidupku tanpa dirimu

Janganlah kau tinggalkan diriku
Takkan mampu menghadapi semua
Hanya bersamamu ku akan bisa

Kau adalah darahku
Kau adalah jantungku
Kau adalah hidupku lengkapi diriku
Oh ABAHku kau begitu....
Sempurna.... sempurna....

abah... in memory.....

Ayahanda saya yang tercinta, Ahmad Bin Abd. Ghani atau lebih ndikenali dgn name Hj. Ling telah kembali kerahmatullah pada 18/10/2008. Beliau telah pergi dengan tenang pada jam 7.55 pagi di wad ICU hospital Batu Pahat... Semoga roh nya dicucuri rahmat dan ditempatkan dikalangan orang-orang yang beriman.

"Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku, aku merayu kepadaMu Ya Allah... Kau ampunkan dosa bapa ku ini... Kau tempatkan beliau dikalangan hamba-hamba Mu yang beriman..."

No words can describe myself rite now.. he was my idol, my saviour, my best friends but after all Allah knows d best...Dia telah meminjamkan insan yang paling berharga kepada kami selama 63 tahun.. Kehilangannya sangat dirasai oleh semua insan yg mengenalinya secara dekat.. To all friends and family, thank u for coming and for d wishes...

nana: salam nurul, aku baru dapat berita ttg pakcik ling.. sorry, aku mungkin x dapat ziarah hr ni, masih outstation. Tp aku harap ko byakkan bersabar dan redha dgn pemergian ayah kau. aku doakan dia d tmptkan org2 yg soleh. take care nurul...

kak mala: i'm sorry 2 hear about ur dad. semuga beliau ditempatkan bersama2 org2 yg beriman. Amin.

Ain: Askum.. Takziah ats pemergian ayahanda.. Semoga kak nurul tabah. Sayang Kak Nurul.. -ain, ayu,jan-

Zera: Nurul, i'm sorry to hear about ur loss. my condolence to u n family. hang in der..

Kak Nurul: Takziah dr akak n kwn2. Banyakkan bersabar. Redhakan pemergiannya. Semoga Allah mencucuri rahmat ke atas rohnya. Al Fatihah.

Aki Cina: Akum nurul, iza kol aku td bgtau yg org tua ko dh xde. takziah ye.. ingat nak kol tp mesti ko tgh xly nak ckp sgt kan. kang dgn aku2 skali nangis. kim salam family ko k.

Huda Dubai: Salam nurul, Innalillahi wainnailaihi rajiun.. i'm really sorry to hear about ur lost. my heartfelt condolences goes out to ur whole family. Pak Ling will always be in our memories. Moga dia ditempatkan di kalangan orang yg beriman. Be strong when facing all this ok nurul. Just let me know if u need me or anything. Take care n kemsalam to mak nong and d rest. luv all of u..

Azhar Zainal: Takziah di atas pemergian abah.. Semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmat.. Saye doakan semuanye selamat.. Amin..

Abang Azri: With all d prayers, do'a n faith 2 ur father n family from me who speechless to express my sadness with regards to it.. i hope, n i pray to ALLAH to give u energy n faith to go on.. i'm sorry.. Luv ya..

Remi: Salam. Takziah ye nurul.. aku dot tau ayah ko meninggal ptg td.. harap ko byk sabar ye....

Abg Jam: Semoga roh arwah ayah nurul berade di kalangan orang2 yang dikasihi

Shafa: nurul!! takziah nurul.. nurul.. aku baru tau td ptg. i'm so sory 2 hear dat. takziah.. nnt ko da blk cni, aku nak jmp ko ye..

kak aufa: huda, salam takziah dr kak aufa sekeluarga. semoga roh ayah huda dicucuri rahmat.

en. dazma: takziah..

en izad: takziah dari saya dan TRR HERITAGE staff.. semoga roh nya dicucuri rahmat.. Amin...

mr elias: no matter what life has got 2 go on nurul. i'm really sorry n feel ur sorrow n grief. pray for him thru doa n steadfast. may u get over with it..

thank you very much everyone...


The last family photo with him...

raye ...... hospital.... abah....

it's been a long time i didn't rite anything..... a long long story to rite here....dunno where 2 start...

i went back to batu pahat on 22 September after received fon call from icam and ilal..... ABAH MASUK HOSPITAL.... then i called my mum.... i didn't hear she say anything except for i heard she cried....
i went home immediately and icam pick me up... we went home with his car...

monday, 22/9 (22 ramadhan)

arrive at batu pahat around 6.30pm.... staright away to d hospital... abah was under dialisis.... depending on the oxygen.... d doctor said d condition is very critical.... ICU penuh so kn masuk wad biasa....on dat nite sumer my relatives blk batu pahat as d condition of my dad sangat teruk. i can't stop crying.... we break fast at d hospital... on dat nite, my dad awake for d first time and i asked for forgiveness...

tuesday, 23/9 (23 Ramadhan)

last nite all of us slept in d hospital... we have to be besides him all d time. mlm tadi abah x ble tdo... he's suffering... nothing much dat we can do except for ask him to relax and ingat Allah all d time.. i went home after subuh. after having my shower, i went back 2 d hospital. Yasin is always in my hand. dats d only thing dat we can do.. hanya Dia yg dapat menolong saat ini.. at 10a.m. abah masuk ICU.. d docs took more than 2 hours to identified d problem. it was d saddest moment when d doctor said abah da xde harapan. all d systems in his body already jammed... but still d dr will try to do sumthing.. after all we know dat d dr is not d God. berdoa dan berdoa. itu jek yg mampu kami lakukan.. we have to be strong. we are d pillars for my mum. ptg 2 kami berbuka di hospital. kak an masak lps blk keje and bw makanan kat hospital. kitorang berbuka mee hailam kat hospital. my mum and i did not stay at d hospital at nite.


wednesday,24/9 (24 ramadhan)

abah still in d ICU. D condition is better than yesterday... all of us bergilir waiting for my dad outside d ICU. in d afternoon, dia kn dialisis lg... diz time is 2 hours. everytime bile dia dialisis, dia akn suffer. pity him. i can c d pain dat he's having.. 2 hours dialisis is still not normal... but then abah still x sedar... hari nie kak an masak asam pedas tulang.. pelik tp menarik and sedap.


thursday, 25/9 (25 ramadhan)

i went to d hospital after subuh as usual. abah sedar. tp dia x ble ckp. he try to say sumthing but we cannot understand. kesian abah... i know my dad very much.. dia akan meradang klu x dpt aper yg dia nak... he tried 2 write sumthing but the only thing dat we can understand is INGAT ALLAH. when we didnt understand wut he said, dia akn meradang.. dr kn ikat tgn abah... but after all, ade improvement.. ptg 2 kak an masak nasi goreng as reguest by hilal.. simple and easy..


friday, 26/9 (26 ramadhan)

my schedule is as usual... hari nie kak intan, abg nizam and oya dtg.. sumer org yg dtg mesti terkejut tgk condition abah... as for me, i cry every time people come and cry... i know everybody loves my dad..
as time goes by, we are still hoping dat the miracles will come... Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku, Kau berikanlah yang TERBAIK untuk kami sekeluarga...


monday, 29/9 (29 ramadhan)

second last day of ramadhan.. hospital is our second house. as for my place, arie nie org da start 'ngunjung'. we have 2 face d reality dat my dad is still in critical condition... arie nie x masak.. tok lela antar nasi bariani for us.. diz hari raye will never be d same... normally at diz time, my dad will be d busiest man on earth. everytime when we wanna go 2 d hospital and past by pasar, i can't stand 2 cry. siapa sangka abah ble jd sampai mcm 2 sekali. ptg 2 mase nak buka, he's awake. dia dgr azan maghrib. when we told him dat we wanna break fast, mengalir air mata dia.. he must be very sad.. i can feel it as well. after isyak, pegi umah tok lela for solat hajat and yasin 40. diorang sekeluarga adalah semangat kami. tok man, tok lela, pakcikmat, ciik nizam, cikri, cikjim and pakcik, mereka adalah semangat kami. we went back home after dat. at diz very moment, azri is my pillar. he will call me every night 2 know d progress about my dad as it is not ezy 2 get me during day time. i will cry to him when i'm sad. Luckily he understand my situation as he can't help me much except give me support.


tuesday, 30/9 (30 ramadhan)

Last day of puasa. for d first time in my life, dgr lagu raye itu menyedihkan. menangis setiap kali dgr lagu raye. we clean and arranged d house s request by my dad b4 dia sakit dulu. xde suasana memasak ketupat or tukar langsir or wut so ever things in my house. Not like other house yg da riuh rendah. ketupat ptg 2 pun tok lela yg antar. but as i said, abah memang ramai yg sayang. ramai yg antar makanan di rumah s sumer org kesian. ketupat, rendang, lodeh, serunding, lemang, sumer ade. yg kami x rase cume suasana memasak jek.. but as for me, i juz cooked d ayam masak merah yg my dad selalu masak s dat is d favourite. i juz dun want icam, ilal 2 be said thinking about dat ayam masak merah. nobody can stand 2 cry ms dgr takbir. siape yg x sedih mengenangkan abah yg sakit s 4 every year after maghrib mlm raye, da dgr dia takbir calling us 2 join him.

Till i write diz entry, abah is still in d same condition. I always want d best for him.